Throw ya Hands Up!

It seems like everyone is just throwing their hands up on this life shit. How is that while we are suppose to endure and perservere, the shit gets more difficult?
I've been reading blogs all day and it seems I am reading the same shit over and over again......EVERYONE REPEAT AFTER ME, "I CAN'T TAKE THIS SHIT NO MO'!"
Let's make a revolution out of this thing called life. Let's ALL stand up and revolt against tumoil and complication and see where it gets us. I have come up with the 5 point program that will get us started. Feel free to add points as you see fit. Put them in my comments and let's get through this mess.
Here we go:

• The next time someone tells you something that is intentionally offensive or blatently not for the purpose of our empowerment, whisper, say out loud, think to yourself or gesture "FUCK YOU". Spin on your heels and never look back.
• If there seems to be an impossible fete in our path, we will send a mass email, network with present resources and jump over the hurdle, cuz even if you fall you still fall on the other side of it...lol. Sad but true.
• If you feel that some part of your life is lackingk, seek desperately to find something closer to attainability, accomplish that, build your confidence and try again. Don't be ashamed to ask for help!
• (Very Important)Re-evaluate your roster. You need to know who is really on your team. I know that many of us are very similar in personality types therefore making it hard for us to cut niggiz off when we need to, cuz it hurts. However, our team isn't big enough for those who don't contribute time and talent. Let go of the dead weight!
• (Finally) Cherish your most honest and loving cohorts. They will not let you go down the wrong paths in life without yuckin' your chain, they won't cuz they probably love and respect you too much. If you need chain yuckin' let me know!

I hope this 5 point program gets somebody somewhere right now. I know I will be trying to live by it...in fact im gonna print this off and paste to my forehead and look at it in the mirror every morning when I wake up. Maybe this shit will sink in.

Everyday is a heavy day in battle, soldiers!

peace.

Means to an End

This post is to openly profess the end of what I knew to be a beautiful relationship. This has been by far the hardest thing I am enduring right now...Picking up my shit and moving on.
I realize that a relationship ending is inevitable, no matter how hard you fight or try, what must be will be. Why it must hurt or cause so much chaos (mentally, physically and emotionally) is unbeknownst to me.
I have always been known as the heartbreaker, the tease and the least likely to want to stay committed as long as I manage to in a relationship, but I really wanted this one to be permanent.
I pride myself in generally being one to accept and press forward but I love this woman. The thought of anyone loving her the way I do is enough to make me want to throw a total B.F. (Bitch Fit)!

How will I get through it...I have no idea. I don't think that entering another relationship would be the ideal thing to do, mostly because it would just be a rebound. I do believe that every next relationship can be and almost is a rebound.
I don't think that cutting this person off is the answer because I would miss her too much. I don't like her right now, but I would miss her nonetheless.
Everyone says that being busy is good but what good is it when she is on my mind almost 24/7?
This shit is torture. I am laughing hysterically as I say that. I feel weak and vulnerable and psycho!
Im tired of getting high, so I keep smoking Newports like a bandit...what the HELL!
I will take any kind of advice, sincere or superficial at this point.

On a funnier note, a women came into my office today and asked me to do her taxes for the new *PHYSICAL year* smh...I wouldn' mind doing her taxes for the new fiscal year, but I didn't bother to tell her that....lol.
.
Going to have a smoke. Holla.
seeking inner Peace. vintage woman.