Some Ol' Stuff
I was looking back on an old blog I had before meeting you crazy folks and it reminded me of movement. Am I making any? Also, since I don't have much to share with the world right now. Here's what I had that you good folks never knew about. Happy reading.
Thursday, January 13, 2005
Commitment
i have issues with commitment. i find that i have a really hard time setting myself to one thing/ person/ look/ tasks. i have noticed that even my selection of friends is really based on having a small group of friends, each one offering some quality that the other doesn't have. wouldn't it just be easier; wouldn't i save money on hallmark cards if i just had a couple of all inclusive packaged friends...lol. If any of you all are reading this, that last line was a joke. I like variety is that so wrong.Last night, I was telling my mom about a guy friend of ours from church who has decided to man up and get married! She said, and i quote, " it's about time he settled down...and you too!"Okay, that was only irritating because first, it's hard to find anyone who can have a whole conversation. second, where do I go to meet anyone with potential? Im tired of going backwards towards the men I have already dealt with. that was a big mistake, i.e. Tenn. i am just waiting patiently for God to show him to me, whoever he is. God, please don't let him be dull and just a little sexy!i still haven't heard from the state job yet. losing patience.
posted by Ell Ess @ 6:53 AM 0 comments
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
Chanting My Mantra
Where are my fruits?I have been working like a dog since I was 17 years old and I often feel as if I don't have anything to show for it. I guess that on the flip side of that, I am only 28 and have plenty of time to sow and reap some career and financial benefits. Im getting some financial advising from a friend with that expertise and I plan to invest in the near future. I will be posting on that as I experience it. Im trying to sharpen my business sense, so I subscribe to Black Enterprise magazine. It has a lot of helpful info and gives some profitable advise. I haven't written any poetry in a while. I write the best when I am loving, as it stands, I am not.Hoping, wishing and praying that I get this job in Lansing! I need a pay increase in my life and a change of pace as well.
a poem trapped in my mindtrapped
in blotches of events
in my lifethat have no stories
just little antecdotes.
a poem is behind my eyes.
staring, wanting
to jump out but held
back by my tongue,
safeguarded by my teeth.
hidden behind my lips,
tightly sealing in secrets.
a poem aborted
by my mind lost
in blotches of events
in my life that happened
with no living proof.
posted by Ell Ess @ 9:01 AM 0 comments
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
This first day.
This being the first day of entry, I guess I want to be fully honest with the reader. Thus making all other entries valid. I haven't been excited by anything since moving out of Brooklyn. Everything is very routine or mundane. I have been keeping busy as best I can. I have obtained this underpaying job, Lord knows Im not trying to complain. It's just boring and I need some sort of excitment. I need some stimulation. I MISS NEW YORK, UUUGGGHHHH! 2004 wasn't too bad to me (with the exception of that New York thing) and 2005 is looking better. I learned in 2004 to crawl before I walk. That is really hard for a visionary such as myself. I just see myself doing so many things, it's hard to just pick one and stick with it as my mother says. I just feel/ and know that I only live once and I don't want any regrets. I want everyone to know that I am not afraid to fall down and get up again. So here I am, in this new year wiping off the dust starting some things over, improving others. Please bare with me. I am a work in progress.Peace.
posted by Ell Ess @ 9:21 AM 0 comments
Thursday, January 13, 2005
Commitment
i have issues with commitment. i find that i have a really hard time setting myself to one thing/ person/ look/ tasks. i have noticed that even my selection of friends is really based on having a small group of friends, each one offering some quality that the other doesn't have. wouldn't it just be easier; wouldn't i save money on hallmark cards if i just had a couple of all inclusive packaged friends...lol. If any of you all are reading this, that last line was a joke. I like variety is that so wrong.Last night, I was telling my mom about a guy friend of ours from church who has decided to man up and get married! She said, and i quote, " it's about time he settled down...and you too!"Okay, that was only irritating because first, it's hard to find anyone who can have a whole conversation. second, where do I go to meet anyone with potential? Im tired of going backwards towards the men I have already dealt with. that was a big mistake, i.e. Tenn. i am just waiting patiently for God to show him to me, whoever he is. God, please don't let him be dull and just a little sexy!i still haven't heard from the state job yet. losing patience.
posted by Ell Ess @ 6:53 AM 0 comments
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
Chanting My Mantra
Where are my fruits?I have been working like a dog since I was 17 years old and I often feel as if I don't have anything to show for it. I guess that on the flip side of that, I am only 28 and have plenty of time to sow and reap some career and financial benefits. Im getting some financial advising from a friend with that expertise and I plan to invest in the near future. I will be posting on that as I experience it. Im trying to sharpen my business sense, so I subscribe to Black Enterprise magazine. It has a lot of helpful info and gives some profitable advise. I haven't written any poetry in a while. I write the best when I am loving, as it stands, I am not.Hoping, wishing and praying that I get this job in Lansing! I need a pay increase in my life and a change of pace as well.
a poem trapped in my mindtrapped
in blotches of events
in my lifethat have no stories
just little antecdotes.
a poem is behind my eyes.
staring, wanting
to jump out but held
back by my tongue,
safeguarded by my teeth.
hidden behind my lips,
tightly sealing in secrets.
a poem aborted
by my mind lost
in blotches of events
in my life that happened
with no living proof.
posted by Ell Ess @ 9:01 AM 0 comments
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
This first day.
This being the first day of entry, I guess I want to be fully honest with the reader. Thus making all other entries valid. I haven't been excited by anything since moving out of Brooklyn. Everything is very routine or mundane. I have been keeping busy as best I can. I have obtained this underpaying job, Lord knows Im not trying to complain. It's just boring and I need some sort of excitment. I need some stimulation. I MISS NEW YORK, UUUGGGHHHH! 2004 wasn't too bad to me (with the exception of that New York thing) and 2005 is looking better. I learned in 2004 to crawl before I walk. That is really hard for a visionary such as myself. I just see myself doing so many things, it's hard to just pick one and stick with it as my mother says. I just feel/ and know that I only live once and I don't want any regrets. I want everyone to know that I am not afraid to fall down and get up again. So here I am, in this new year wiping off the dust starting some things over, improving others. Please bare with me. I am a work in progress.Peace.
posted by Ell Ess @ 9:21 AM 0 comments
posted by Ms_Scott at 12:44 PM
2 Comments:
Loved the poem!
You should move back to NY. I know you got at least ONE friend here =)
I'm that friend that you never had...That one that encompasses everything you are scared to have packaged in one individual. I know, I know. I'm just amazing. And I just can't help it. LMAO...Just joking..Though I've read those joints before, I can't help but go through a slew of emotions after reading them again. This life is so crazy. And sometimes, it feels as if we go through circles of negaitivity. Like sometimes, we can't see our way out of difficulty. But as I've said to you time and time again, "you have to hit rock bottom to understand what it feels like once you've made it to the top." Something great is about to happen for you. Make that move ma!
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